Did you know you’re probably a nerd? The heart of a nerd yearns for something beautiful. As a nerd you aren’t satisfied with the way life is going now, yet other than trying to rebuild yourself as something else—something with abs and a mustache and a deep love of whisky—you’re not sure where to turn.
Nerds, we need to talk. In today’s conversation I’m launching us into a topic I’ve avoided for years. Today we talk about being nerds, what that means for those within, and outside of, digital spaces, and what it means to be a nerd and a follower of Christ.
I’m not going to make excuses for your bad habits or sins, but I am going to point you to the God of all Wonder who has made and designed each one of you to be vessels of his glory. Your nerdiness, and that of your spouse, roommates, and children, might be just that.
Transcription:
Hello everyone and welcome to the Gospel Tech podcast. My name is Nathan Sutherland and this podcast is dedicated to helping families love God and use tech. Today I am super excited to talk with you because it is the beginning of a little passion project of mine. Excuse me, so passionate, I can barely speak.
This is an idea I had. I pitched it to a couple friends and they’re like, maybe you should think about that. And then someone else approached me and in talking about content we’re going to be creating and how is Gospel Tech moving forward and progressing our content, how can we be the most supportive and helpful to families like yours?
I was asked, “What are you really passionate about?” And if my first passion is seeing young people reach their potential, that’s my goal behind Gospel Tech, behind the other ministry, Flint and Iron, and the public spaces. I want to see young people hear the truth of the gospel and for God to be able to use that to just spark purpose in their hearts and recognize that they can live from their identity in Christ, not for their identity out there in something else.
That’s my first passion. My second then is for dads, and if I had to put a micro group on that, it’s for nerd dads. This probably isn’t a surprise to anyone who’s listened to more than five episodes, but I am a bit of a nerd and I have this just passion to have that conversation and that’s what we’re going to do starting today.
For the next few weeks, we’re going to be talking to nerd dads specifically. So moms who are listening to this, I know that’s like half of our listenership. That’s awesome. Thank you for being here. I hope that you’re encourage us. Please still listen to these. Yes, I’m talking to nerd dads, but you’re probably married to one. There’s a really good chance, as you’ll hear in today’s episode, there’s a really good chance you’re married to a nerd. He may not identify as that. He may not even know that. It might not be words you guys have used, but you also might know that and it may be a regular part of your conversations.
That is an area I want to work into because it’s when I get asked about a lot, especially when it comes to my testimony and my history with gaming, and people kind of want me to step into their lives and be like, well, tell us how to do it. I’m not going to do that.
What I’m going to do is I’m going to help delineate what this conversation is. What does it mean to be a nerd? What does that look like in terms of loving Jesus and being made new and in light of the gospel? And then what can we do out of that as nerd dads, as dads who are looking to raise young people in this world who love God and use tech? That’s the space I want to step into. I am going to do this cautiously because I don’t have all the answers, but the ones I’ve got I think can be helpful and encouraging.
So that’s where we’re headed. If you have any questions or comments as we go through this. Questions can go to [email protected]. Send me an email or direct message, Instagram, Facebook @ loveGodusetech.
We’re talking nerd dads in the next couple of weeks and we’re going to go ahead and I guess with no further ado, get this conversation started.
All right, nerd dads episode one, here we go. And by the way, I don’t have a fancy title yet. I’ll work on that. The smarter minds than myself are working on how to make that. But the concept here being how do we talk to nerd dads and raise up kids who love God and use tech. So nerd dads number one, here we are.
Really what I want to address with this is what do we mean by nerd? Who am I trying to talk to when we say that and what should we know? I think if we can get through that today and we’ve set this stage then, I believe just having that conversation is going to equip some people, some wives who love people in this situation, either their own children or their spouse or both, some husbands who are attempting to make sense of these kind of draws of their hearts and determine where is it appropriate, where is it not, and some young people who are yet to be married, single individuals, boys and girls, who are processing the desires and the amazing wiring that God has given them for certain aspects of life that may be outside the pale of regular standard amazement.
What I mean by that, I’ll make clear, but some of you guys are wired and ladies are wired for very unique work that God has put into you and the category of nerd fits. And my hope is at the end of that, you’ll be able to reflect on how God’s made you, give all the glory to God, use those skills and gifts to make much of God’s abilities that he’s put into you and truly be light and salt in this tech world that we’ve got.
I do not believe the correct answer is try to get back to the Stone Age or some kind of Luddite past that we carefully forget certain aspects of. I don’t think subsistence farming is a better existence. I don’t think dying of preventable diseases is the best. We absolutely have some problems in our world and between now and when Jesus comes back and makes all things new, we have the opportunity to be his hands and feet, to be ambassadors, and it’s going to be letting Christ work through us in the ways God has wired us, our weaknesses specifically and sometimes even our strengths.
So that’s my hope in this first conversation. Future conversations is going to be things like how do we model healthy limits for our children? What does that look like for us to live out and for our kids to experience the wonder and the awe, but not to get consumed by it as a goal in itself? So that’s the big picture.
Again, I’m trying to take this deliberately. I don’t want to be heard as trying to fix people. I want to be heard as someone who’s passionate about this and wants to see you all, see what God has called you to do, have and be in him.
So all right, number one, what do we mean by nerd? I made a huge list here, but I’m going to share just a little bit of it. When I say nerd, this is the big picture, 10,000 foot view, you’ve got a niche that you find for the spectacular. It isn’t just technology at this level. Everyone’s got this. Every single person on the planet who isn’t dealing with a large amount of scarring or issues. We can be traumatized I think, into shelling ourselves away from amazement because it’s too much emotion and we just want to be factual and literal and we want to try to avoid anything other than just the black and white issues. But barring that, all of us have been designed for wonder, for seeing God in nature, for being amazed by things bigger and so much smaller than us, whether that’s our children or whether that’s studying biology or the universe, whether it’s reading stories or watching shows, like we’re amazed.
So for example, you are going to find amazement in books or games or sports, in nature or hiking or exercise, in cooking or art or mechanical workings of things. Some examples, I have a neighbor who is a nerd about motorcycles, specifically classic motorcycles and fixing them and restoring them and he could talk about restoring engines and pistons and all things motorcycles till his lungs give out. It’s something he’s very passionate about. That is finding amazement in something very, very specific, that for those of us who know nothing about motorcycles, we’re like, I can listen to you but I can’t participate in this conversation. And generally a nerd doesn’t care. They just want you to be interested in what they’re interested in.
And that’s true with people with books, that’s true with people with fishing. When I wanted to take my boys out this year to learn fishing, I don’t know how to fish. I’ve been fishing, but it’s always with people who know what they’re doing. So I called up a mentor who is a nerd for fishing. He knows every kind of line and what a leader means and the different weights. I was told buy this size hook, buy this ounce of weight, buy this kind of line, buy this length of rod. We are going to go fish in a river for salmon. I live here in the Northwest, salmon literally just swim in the rivers of my local town and I wanted to go get in some of that. And so, we went out and he had pre-tied 10 sets of leader lines for us. So every time I or one of my boys, but generally me, hooked one under our rock in this river and it snapped off, great, he showed me how to retie it on.
Those are the people. It wasn’t me having to hire a coach. Like, this is a man who loves fishing and who wants other people to love fishing. If you love something and want other people to love that, there’s a really good chance you’re a nerd. You find awe in it, you want other people to find awe in it.
And that is an amazing thing that is, that doesn’t matter if you’re follower of Christ for this. This is talking about there is something in you that is wired for that. Can it be misused? Yes. Can it be looked to for hope and purpose and we start to identify ourselves by these nerd allocations? Absolutely we can, but we don’t have to. And that’s what I’m trying to speak to here is that all of us have this. I really think there’s two categories. I’m going to be broad in this, but two categories of people and it’s boys and girls, but I’m going to use a biblical example and it’s two boys, so bear with me.
I think there’s Jacobs and Esaus. I do think there are these people where your passion and the thing that brings you awe is the hunting and the trapping and the cleaning and the gutting and the processing of the meats. You are out there in the dirt and in the toil and that’s amazing. That’s really cool. And you’re still nerds. You’re nerds about bow hunting and you’re nerds about fishing, you’re nerds about hiking and you’re nerds about skydiving. You’re nerds about those things. And I would say where the difference changes in this conversation is that when we talk about nerdom and then we add the technology, generally people think, oh, that’s a nerd. They usually think Star Wars screens, right? Like niche, technological, nerdom.
The difference when you’re passionate about a digital space in your nerdom is that we’re not forced to go outside and to be in the things that are bigger than us. In fact, most technology is about control, right? Coding is all about being in control of the sentences you make for this computer and the computer perfectly following the things you say and your environment doing things that you want it to do, be that on a technological engineering level or just an experienced UI level. The whole premise behind user interface design is making sure the user feels in control, feels like they’re the ones making this stuff happen. On our digital side, we’re not forced to recognize or submit to the rules of something greater. You want to be a nerd about hunting, you still have to hunt. People have hunted. Like sure, maybe you get a firearm, maybe you use a stand and wait, but at some point weather has to be something you think about, the time of year something you have to think about. Animals only come around certain areas during certain times because they’re animals and that’s the way they’re designed and you have to bend to that. You got to go where the animals are. You don’t just get to pick where you find one.
So in computer world, in digital world, we get to pick a lot of the stuff we want. We get to pick our environments and our very specific games and you can get very, very specialized in your nerdom. And that’s something to notice when we talk about this. Yes, everyone’s got it because they’re in love with it, but there is a difference between your analog nerds, my neighbor with the motorcycles, my mentor in fishing, where you have to, I was forced to recognize that this river flows this way because of the recent rains, because of the mountains in our region, because of the way it’s been damned upriver, like because, because, because, because the salmon are here at this time of year because, because, because, they come from Alaska, it was years ago. This is where they were born.
There’s science and explanations, whereas in a game it can be a much more controlled microcosm. It was this game is designed for this experience and to give you this sort of an interaction. We can then get distracted by that. And that is something to notice when you have your Jacobs and Esau, as I mentioned, Jacob is the one who stayed with the tent. Esau is the one who went out and went hunting. It’s not good or bad. There’s not one of those two examples that is a “man”, but they are different because Esau was forced to deal with the fact that he wasn’t able to catch anything and forced to deal with the fact that the sun gets hot and the nights get cold and there’s certain ways to trap and certain ways to hunt and certain ways to clean.
Whereas Jacob, especially in a digital space, you stay home with the tents, you can make a little universe of your own around you and it could put you at the center instead of God at the center. You’re not forced to deal with the fact that you are human, you are mortal and that you are finite. A lot of technology is actually there to promise us otherwise. No, no, you can do this forever. You can be greater, you could be bigger, you could be the best at everything all the time, and you’re the only one competing because you’re the only one in this game who isn’t a character that was designed to be beaten.
So keep that in mind is our lengthy second point. But the first is we’ve all got nerdom. The second is in the digital space, when we look at this kind of concept that I have in my head of Jacob and Esaus, that Esaus have these more analog and then some of us are more of the Jacobs and we pick the adventures that are still there. But as soon as digital adventures become an option, as soon as space is designed for success become an option, we can get distracted by that and we want to be deliberate with it.
And I don’t want to take this analogy too far with Jacobs and Esaus, I’m just trying to show that there are two kinds of people. There are people that absolutely get their joy out of being in those hard spaces and doing those hard analog real life things and they still do them the same way they’ve done them, maybe different equipment, but the process is still there and you’re forced to deal with the greater reality of our mortality and our finite abilities. And in digital spaces it sometimes blurs those lines and we often become the middle. That’s all I’m trying to do with Jacob and Esau. I don’t know if I’ll run that any further, but it has come to my brain that I have seen myself be wired differently from people and they’re like, “Oh, I just love doing these things outside.” I’m like, “Yeah man, it doesn’t do it for me.” It’s good. I enjoy it and I’m glad you like it and I’ll come with you, but that doesn’t turn my crank. This thing does. This gets me really excited.
So when we talk about nerds, it’s something we’re trying to talk about. There is a chance, excuse me, that you have experienced if you are a nerd and specifically the digital side. Now I’m making that pivot to the digital side of nerd. Third thing, you probably have experienced Tolkien’s understanding of fantasy and the escapism is a positive thing. Yes, it can be negative, but there is this recognition in the nerd of all varieties and in the digital nerd specifically, that the world is not as it should be. That this brokenness is not meant to be here and we can find wonder in story and adventure and in shared experiences and in explaining through even conflict in digital spaces, the conflicts we see in our own hearts, minds, communities, world.
And so, we use those to express and communicate these adventures and these conflicts and these greater stories and that’s beautiful and that kind of escapism of looking through as Tolkien describes, looking through the bars of the prison of this world to the world that we’re being called to and saying, “That’s more of what I want. I want to describe that and bring other people into that space again. I’m passionate about something, I want to share it with them.”
But the fourth thing we need to recognize is while that’s good, that kind of escapism of recognizing this as a temporary reality that points to a greater reality, the shadow of love, the shadow of sacrifice, the shadow of the parenting and commitment and friendship and joy and sunrises and anything we enjoy, those are shadows of what will be when we are made new and we can truly experience God’s presence unmitigated. That greater reality is awesome.
And number four, we have the propensity to let these little realities become our greater reality. That we see that truth and we’re like, oh, I’m so passionate about that. That’s all I want. And now all of a sudden I serve the creation of this new reality. I want to make it happen now. And so instead of diving into the world, God has called me to, Ephesians 2:10 says, “We are prepared beforehand for good works.” Instead of dedicating myself to those good works, I go, “Man, this world is too hard. I just don’t think I can cut it so I’m going to escape from it.” And it’s not the escape from prison towards the greater reality and bring other people with me. It’s escape from the reminder that this reality isn’t as good as it could be and I’m just going to really take care of myself and I escape into my own heart and into my own mind and into my own space. And I don’t take anyone with me and I don’t want anyone there frankly, because they mess it up because they’re part of this broken world. That is a concern for us nerds and we need to recognize that.
Do analog nerd people do that as well? Absolutely. I think we’ve all witnessed people who use sports and athletics and outdoors and activities as escapes from the real world. We’re not even talking by the way about unhealthy dependence issues. We’re not talking about that right now. We’re simply talking about the good things that are being used to the wrong end.
I guess the last thing would be as a nerd, please understand that you probably don’t resonate, excuse me, with that hashtag grind nation mentality. Nerds, often we are seen as a problem in society, like if we just got these people to be motivated, if you just got up and folded your socks and put them away better, then things would be okay. And while having organized socks is amazing, and yes, your life is a series of small choices at the end of the day, having a six pack and having climbed that mountain and having an organized sock drawer just means that people have different stuff to put away when you die because you’ve got nothing to take with you.
We’ve all read Ecclesiastes, we understand that we’re nothing but a vapor, that this life is not a trial run. It’s the only run. And when you cross over, you’re going to react to God the same way you react to him in this life. You’re either going to blame him and tell him he should listened to you or you’re going to worship him and bend your knee and celebrate that he is still just as good as he’s always been. Those are really your only two outcomes.
So while I hope you have the body you want, and I hope you get to take the adventures that you have planned and that bring you much joy in light of who God’s made you to be, I hope you don’t find your purpose in them. I hope that business and that bank account and that fitness goal doesn’t define you. I hope it describes you and it’s one more thing God is using to draw you out and to bring himself glory and to do something good in your life and with those around you.
A lot of nerds find that people come around him and tell them, “Hey, you know what? Here’s 12 steps. You got to do them.” You’ve got to get out there and exercise more. You got to grow a beard. You need to drink more beer or whiskey. You need to learn how to do something awesome with your hands and basically, just become an analog nerd, not a digital nerd. Which there’s some great things about analog nerds. I think there’s an argument there, but analog nerd does not mean child of God.
So please, if you hear a lot of that grind nation stuff and you agree with it like, yeah, I just wish I could get going and get motivated, you are not a problem to fix. You’re a person to love. The nerdy part of you is part of how God has wired you. There might be part that you need to submit, and that’s our final point.
I hope that this has been encouraging for you. We’re going to end on that point for today. But please understand that your nerdom is designed by God and it’s beautiful. We’re going to continue that conversation next week, specifically talking about three things that God has made us this way and that that can be really, really good, but that he’s also better than even the best of our nerdom and hobbies and passions and interests, and that we can trust him. We can trust him with our joy. We can trust him with our interests. We can trust him to be enough for us. Whether he allows us to continue pursuing these interests or asks us to give him up, he’s better because at the end of the day, we are to love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. Love our neighbors, ourselves, including our spouse, including our neighbors, our children, including our enemies, and help others do the same. Make disciples.
Thank you to everyone who’s helped make this podcast possible. Thank you for listening, for liking, for sharing with others, and for subscribing so you don’t miss any of that new content. Thank you as well for leaving a rating and a review. If this was encouraging to you, would you please share it with someone? Would you talk about it with them? Would you say, “Hey, I listened to something. What do you think?” I’m trying to be anything but completely conclusive in this conversation, but I do want to start it because I think it’s really important. It’s specifically important for dads to recognize you are a nerd whether you like it or not, and some of us are nerds in digital spaces. That will be next week’s conversation.
Would you come back and join us for that in-between, check us out on social media, Facebook and Instagram @LoveGodUseTech. You can send me a direct message if you have any questions, any concerns, anything that helped you. And if you have any questions you want either for a future episode or just to have answered, you can reach out [email protected]. Just send us an email. And then again, please join us next week as we continue this conversation about how we can love God and use tech.
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